Le Sigh

I’m in SOOOOOO much trouble.

So, I sent Kirby a message this morning around 8:00…

You definitely aren’t the only one who is excited. If I had a choice, I’d see you again today! I’m sure both of us would be obnoxiously tired but I know I wouldn’t care. But, we can’t so I’ll just stop torturing myself….le sigh.

This is where you being in **** would come in REALLY handy…cause we could just go to lunch together and stuff during the week. Oh, the complications of being single parents living nearly an hour apart…then again, that could be a good thing…I don’t want you getting sick of me that fast.

Hopefully, you aren’t TOO tired today…or at least get a nap in later. I was so wound up last night I ended up passing out on my couch around 4:30…and I woke up at 7:30, so I’m currently on 3 hours of sleep…which will change shortly because I will go back to sleep….I hope. I need to go to a masseuse or something, my back has been extremely tight since my anxiety has been so high…that is part of the reason I can’t get relaxed enough to sleep at night. I think I should pick up some melatonin today in case my sleep issues continue…ok, I’m rambling now so I’ll leave you be….for now.

Oh, and just so you know, every time I think of your kiss, I shiver (that is a good thing).

I didn’t expect to hear from him until much later in the day since I knew he was working. Instead, I received this message 30 minutes later…

So. What time do your kids come home today?

I replied and let him know the kids didn’t come home until tomorrow…and then he called. He said he only had to work for a little longer and instead of taking a nap like he had planned he wanted to come see me again. *cheers* So, he came back down and we hung out from 10:30 to 2:30. I could have hung with him all day if given the chance. It is SOOOOO amazing to have someone understand me who has only known me for a very short period of time!! He is amazing!! And he says the most amazing things!!! And his kiss is amazing!! And his touch…ok, I think you get the picture.

I’m smitten.

Feels Good

So, apart from the fact I was late to this morning’s “All ISS Staff Meeting regarding the IT Assessment Study” thanks to my stupid, STBX husband not waking up on time, I’m feeling pretty good about my work life. There were 3 slides worth of “commendations” the consulting firm gathered from the campus…I personally made slide 3. The campus specifically commented on and commended my job so much it made it on the slides. THAT SO TOTALLY ROCKS!!!

Awesome!!

It never ceases to make me feel absolutely and totally appreciated when I meet a new person on campus and introduce myself and they say they have heard all about me (in a good way) or they know exactly who I am or I’m Small Bytes. This morning me and a couple others from my area had a meeting with an IT consulting company who has been meeting with everyone on campus all week long. I was the first to arrive and I introduced myself to the consultant lady and to our Interim CIO (also from the consulting firm). They both told me how much they’ve heard about me and that many people think there should be several of me on campus. That also made me feel so great to know they like me so much they want multiple me’s. Apparently, I’m doing my job well.

Life is good.

I only seem to post when something extraordinary happens, good or bad. I decided I would post simply because life is going well. Tony and I are getting along great. The kids are being great. Money is going decent. Housing renovation loan possibilities seem to be going along well. School is good. What more is there in life?

Of course, I should have never stated these things on here because now that I have taken notice something bad will happen.

Looking up?

Well, I decided it was time for a change so I got me a new layout. I think it is pretty cool and fitting of me.

Things seem to be going better as of late. I think this medicine is really helping. I don’t feel quite so frustrated and completely exhausted all the time. Tony & I seem to be getting along a bit better. I think a lot of it is probably my new found calm but he seems to be trying to keep it calm instead of doing whatever he feels like. The money situation is getting worse but hopefully by the end of next month that will all change. We had to borrow a ton of money from my parents to get the supplies to re-roof half our roof and get a new electic hot water heater so we could tear down our deteriorating chimney. Now we are just waiting to see if one of our loan prospects is going to go through so we can finish getting the outside of the house fixed up and then we need Dad to get some more extra time to start working on the inside of the house so our kids can get seperate rooms. There just always has to be something more that needs to be done. One step forward, three steps back. I should be used to that dance by now.

Do I see a light?!?!?

Hopefully I’m not getting ahead of myself like normal but I think I’m beginning to see a light at the end of the tunnel. Tony & I are working on a new way of fixing our relationship and it seems that everything is going pretty well so far. There were a few revelations made last night and I am feeling better about that whole situation. It gave me what I needed to be able to cool off and relax a bit.

And on the remodeling money front, I realized the other day that we may be able to get some more money from Rural Development in a low interest loan that would let us fix up a bit more of the house so I’m not feeling quite so overwhelmed there. I just need to get the application filled out and find out if I’m jumping the gun or not.

Wee!