Calm

I’m very calm today. I didn’t get to bed until midnight due to an extremely long phone conversation…a good one, I just need to learn not to wait 2-3 weeks to talk to my best friend. Then I slept like crap because the thunder was so loud it almost shook me out of bed several times. Yet, this morning I’m happy, content, and at peace with life. Even Bailey couldn’t get to me. 🙂

It feels like everything is going to be alright. Despite the fact I only met Kirby not even a week ago…despite the fact we aren’t sure how often we can see each other…despite the fact I’m so love-sick it’s not even funny…despite all that, I feel like it will be okay…we can do this…and it WILL be worth it. Those are some scary thoughts for something happening this fast.

These feelings are all so foreign to me. I have been in love countless times. I have been in fast-moving relationships (not quite this fast though I must say). Hell, I even got married…but I have NEVER felt like this. I have never felt so comfortable…so safe…there is no nagging voice in the back of my head warning me not to go on…There has ALWAYS been that voice telling me something wasn’t right…and I’ve always ignored it only to learn it was right. I’m not sure how to react with no voice there…that voice always at least slowed my heart down a little…without that voice, my heart is in over-drive!

So, of course, I’m deliriously happy but scared to death that the other shoe is going to fall. I guess all I can say is, “Bring it on!!” If it falls, it will crush me…but I’m strong enough to pick up the pieces.

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